Archive for February, 2008
ear hurts
sadistic stupid person stuck a tube in my ear which felt like a knife and then she said, “are you okay?’ after i was crying and said “it hurts”. i hate crying in front of people! does it look like im okay? i think she just hated me or has no empathy at all or [...]
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IM SO TIRED but this is ‘easy’
so .. much. hw. why am i talking about my prof instead of the millions of things i must dooooo. ugh to top it ioff i am still deaf. doesnt change the fact that i really didnt do the BP correctly because i couldnt hear the tapping sound. wow, feigning false confidence is really bad. [...]
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i knew it i knew it i knew it. he went to catholic school and is irish and he’s a compassionate man. i could just tell.. he’s a male nurse. he must be soo nice and caring.. he says things very gently but also firmly. i like him…and he is soo funny, today he was showing [...]
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so today i was more reality based, quiet, and calm… not erratic, anxious, and plurging forward. i was like go with the flow, be in the moment, accept the silence, and dont analyze or look into shit too much that isnt worth analyzing over. so i feel a lil dead from being this way, because i [...]
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i suppose i took this online test that tells me that i’m proud. oh fuck it, everyone is proud. i might think im proud because a. im young and im in the program.. and b. i kinda do OK on tests…
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why am i PROUD?? putangina ka! i was so ugly and fat in hs and i was such a better person than i am now.. ew ew ew.. i have this self righteous, i’m so perfect and smarter holier than thou FUCKING ATTITUDE. it’s so annoying! why am i like this?? why do i think [...]
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people can provide so much comfort at different parts in your life… whatever. like one minute you’ll be saying, oh i hate having to please this person, it’s uncomfortable how i have to be tentative around this person… even if this person is really sweet, smart whatever. i dont know why this happens. i TRY to hard to BE [...]
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everyday is a new day
yes.. everyday is a new day… and i will probably fail that quiz TOMORROWWW on restraints and pharm.. FUCK PHARM!!!!!!! after taking the quizzes today, i feel like i’ve got this shit made and now i’m hardly STUDYING at all. i just took ONE quiz and now i think i’m all capable and crap. RUGHGH!!! [...]
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saturday
i have soo much to read, and i have to pass three quizzes next week.. i hope i make it, plus read up on vital signs and pain and whatever.
problems with me
1. i guess work too much… and then when i dont know the answer, i answer outloud just to say something. but [...]
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nursing is scary.
so now i’m a nurse student and i have no idea what i got myself into. infection, prevent, precautions, contaimination, washing,… i’m nervous that i’m going to kill someone because i’ve contaminated my sterile gloves. 2nd day and i cant even put the fucking GLOVE ON! there are only 10 people in my lab and [...]
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